Friday Funny

Cat Truths

1. There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
2. Never feed your cat anything that doesn't match the carpet.
3. Cat's motto: "No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look as if the dog did it."
4. Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
5. You know when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"
6. "Humans: No fur, no paws, no tail. They run away from mice. They never get enough sleep. How can you help but love such an absurd animal?" - Anonymous cat about humans
7. Anything on the ground is a cat toy. Anything not there yet, will be.
   
8. For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat.
9. Cats are like potato chips. You can never have just one.
10. These aren't my thoughts, they're my cat walking on the keyboard.
11. Everyone knows cats are on a higher level of existence. These silly humans are just too big-headed to admit their inferiority.
12. Cats are better than any vice. They're not fattening, dangerous, or expensive. However, they can be addictive.
13. I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted, but his or her entertainment value.
14. Some people have cats and go on to lead normal lives.